Wednesday, June 8, 2022

Let's Reflect On DNA ~ My DNA

My kids and I are the bear den ... 

I got Ancestry DNA Kits over 5 years ago, for my (then) husband and I.  It was our "anniversary" gift - for each other.  Basically I bought my own gift and called it ours - I mean - let's be real....  

The results, when they hit, I thought were so fucking amazing!  Mostly because it confirmed the fact that I'm Irish.  But I mean - the rest was cool too.....  called myself the "whitest white girl ever" ..... Total European blood going on here.... 

Through the years - the "results" have adjusted and changed based on newer tests and being able to test different things.  So it's been interesting ... over the years ....  watching it change.  I get more Irish and it makes me so happy and then bam ... it changes again!!   Then I am Scottish too and I'm thinking .... Oooooooooohhhhhhh .. yes please! 

So - the tests have changed percentages and added things here and there..... 

I also got my son's Calahan and Noah tested - their father my first ex husband ... hasn't done an Ancestry DNA test and likely won't...  so I felt it was important to get them tested first. 

Kaedyn has expressed wanting his done - so I have kept it in mind and for Mother's Day - while the kits were on sale (almost half off) ...  I got three more.  One for Nathan, one for Kaedyn, and one for Noah's girlfriend Melly who was "adopted" through the foster care system. 

Melly got put in the foster system around the age of 7, I won't say why.  She was then later adopted.  I won't get into the crap she went through - but needless to say, she has disowned her adoptive family.  She does know her birth mom and some of her family.  She'd like me to do her family tree.  However that's going to take her mom giving up information.  

Also - when I did Noah and Calahan's tests, I got a test for my boyfriend Larry.  

So this is what my results looked like when I got them in 2016

These are my results now.... 


Vastly different.  

They also added a new feature where you can from which parent you got what ...  


I figured out - based on what I know about my ancestry - and the others that I did - that Parent #1 is the Sperm Donor and that Parent #2 is the Egg Donor.  And it's going to be like that with everyone because if they did switch that shit up it'd be too fucking confusing ... 

So my Irish comes from my Dad - no shock there, my grandmother (his mother) is supposed to be full Irish.   I did get a sliver of Irish from my Mom's side.  

German is a split, I got 10% from my Dad and 17% from my mom.

Norwegian is not a shocker - my Great Grandmother - my Mom's Dad's Mom - was full Norwegian.  Her name was Olga - how much more Norwegian can you get? 

The English is a 5% (Dad) 9% (Mom) split ...  

I got all my Scottish from my Dad

And Sweden & Denmark is 1% my Dad and 3% my Mom .... 

And those are the ingredients that made me!!  


Tuesday, June 7, 2022

Interesting Question... to Nazi or not to Nazi



So ...  my ex-husband, my soon to be ex husband, my children and I all have German blood coursing through our veins.... all varies amounts. 

My soon to be ex            husband has - for sure - confirmed the rumors of Jewish ancestors ... and although his specific line had already come to America by the time Hitler started to pound his way through the Jewish populations in Europe.  Even KNOWING that there were kin - at the time - most likely still living there .. cousins and such ... it's sobering.  Even for me, and I've found now factual Jewish lines.  It's still heartbreaking and brings this sense of loss and anger.  Huge loss and so much anger.  

I also admit I am fascinated with that time period.  All those Nazi bunkers buried under the Earth with miles of tunnels and hidden rooms.  

The controversy/conspiracy  of  did Hitler die, or did he escape.  It's interesting.  

I watch Jewish documentaries and cry, my heart breaks and my soul is shatterd.  I can't understand how someone can do that to another living soul.  

And I watch stuff on them discovering this or that underground tunnel system or the above ground stuff too.  I love architecture but mostly it's the abandoned for over 50 years and finding it now....  and I find the mad brilliance fascinating.  

It's part of history and no one can fix the absolute devastation that was caused on human life and feelings of being safe in not only your own community but your own skin.  Also, I can't help but be fascinated with other aspects.  




I recently read this article about a woman who was basically hired to have "Hitler's Babies" ... not actually Hitler's but .... babies with the proper blood lines.  I had no idea this even went on.  

The woman who gave birth for Hitler   <---- the article I had read. 

I guess girls were found, with the appropriate looks and pedigree, I guess...  and they were taken to these places where they would .... well....  procreate with S.S. Soldiers,   They would get pregnant.  Have their babies, and then the babies would be taken and raised in some institution so that they could be properly brainwashed to believe and live the Nazi ideals.  

It blew my mind.  

And all I can think is - what happened to all those babies???   

Well - first off....  it wasn't Hitler's Babies.  It was Himmlers.  Heinrich Himmler created the program for a few reasons.  During World War I there was a catastrophic loss of life for German soldiers.  The birth rate post-war plummeted because so there was a shortage of German men to marry and have children with the "nice German women." And his precious Aryan race was depleting.  There were not proper families being formed, which lead to the second problem. German women were choosing to have abortions rather than give birth if they were not meeting society standards of marriage and then children .....  it is estimated that 800,000 abortions were happening every year.  Himmler, being the nice guy he was (that was sarcasm) wanted to give these women a place to go to have their babies.  

Then - after that kind hearted gesture (ha ha) he realized that he could control who had babies and the type of people having babies.  He could stack numbers of babies that meet the Aryan race criteria and create a wind fall of exactly what he wanted.  

So - women started applying to be part of the LEBENSBORN PROGRAM.  Some people also refer to it as Fountain of Life that was created by RFSS Himmler.


"Lebensborn" means various things I guess.... I have seen a couple ... most often I see that it means; "Spring of Life," or “Fount of Life.”  It was a way for the Germans a way to rebuild their population of racially acceptable citizens. Because no ordinary citizen would do. 

Himmler realized this was also the opportunity to control who was breeding and being born, and the Lebensborn program became a way for Nazis to lend a helping hand to "racially and genetically valuable families with many children." 

A series of Nazi-sponsored children's homes were set up throughout the Reich.  The very first one opened up in 1937 in a Munich suburb.

In order to be accepted into the program, you had to do the following.

.* Parents needed to prove German ancestry, documented, several generations back.
 * rigorous testing proving no genetic diseases or disabilities. 
 * DEFINITELY NOT JEWISH (assholes
 * Dedicated to the Nazi cause
 
Failing ANY of that criteria would get the mother turned away.  It was said only about 40% of women were accepted.  I am sure looks took a part in it also.  But that's just my opinion. cuz they were assholes and it seems like an asshole thing to do.  

Fathers, by the way, had to meet the same criteria - and they did all this in secret from their wives and children, if they had them already.  Men were encouraged to take as many women as they could and have as many babies as they could father to improve the population. So men - spread your seed far and wide - but only with the right women.  

Himmler expected every SS officer to have at least four children. Legitimate or illegitimate.

I think that - unwed mothers - who were already pregnant - would be accepted into the program if they met the criteria.  I don't know this for a fact but Himmler's thought was to provide a place for the unwed mothers to go and have their child away from the judging eyes.  So I believe that happened. 

I also read an interview with one of the women who applied for the program to get pregnant and to have a baby for the greater cause.  (Ugh

During their initiation, they were told they would have to sign documents stating they had no rights to their babies, that the babies would be taken to a special place to be raised as loyal Nazi citizens. 

These women would go through all the testing and documentation and then they would move into these compounds.  Their cycles would be monitored and then at the right time, there would be a "date" night with S.S. Soldiers - to see if they connected with any - and if they did - they would basically have a one night stand { wink, wink, smooch } ....  and hope to get pregnant. 




If they did, they would move to a different part of the compound, or move to another compound, and wait out the pregnancy.  Once they went into labor, they would deliver, without aid.  Apparently any "good German woman" wouldn't aid her birth by dulling the pain, that was frowned upon.  

They would "ween" their children for two weeks and then the child would be taken.
 






Everyone in the "program" would have aliases.  No one went by their own given name.  Anonymity was key to the program. Because of this, and the fact that the Nazis' that be destroyed the birth certificates and paperwork for this program, thousands and thousands of children were left not knowing who their parents were ..... and what happened to them at  the end of the war? 

So....  we have unwed mothers, we have woman who signed up for the cause, and then we come to all the children who were kidnapped.  Yes, kidnapped.  

Another part of this program was kidnapping children that physically meet the criteria of an Aryan.  Blond(e) hair, blue eyes... measurements would be taken, height, weight, teeth, head, distance between their eyes and who knows what else.  Some children were just taken based on their looks. Later tested and examined.  Some were tested and examined - accepted or rejected on site.  


Children were taken right out of their classrooms.  Children were taken off the streets.  Children were taken from the Jewish Concertation Camps. Yes, you read that right.  JEWISH children were taken,, tests, accepted or rejected to be part of the Aryan society - and then were told they were no longer Polish or whatever they may have been and only allowed to speak German and raised to be part of the Nazi Cause.  They were put in foster homes at first and later adopted into acceptable German families.  

So we have unwed pregnant women coming in - so they could have their babies and not have abortions.

There were the women who decided to sacrifice their bodies for the cause

And then there were the kidnapped children.  

{ sigh } Can you imagine what those parents went through that were kidnapped?  Taken right out of school and didn't show up home when expected.  Taken off the streets from their parents, I am sure if the parents objected they would be threatened and or shot.  Ugh it breaks my heart.  

So what happened to the children who were born or kidnapped that were deemed unacceptable to the Aryan standard?  

Well ... they were put in orphanages, euthanized, or systematically executed (murdering assholes!).... 

Yep, you read that right.  I read it and it made me absolutely sick.  

There was estimated 20,000 babies born into the program though the TRUE number will never be known.  It was estimated between 100,000 and 200,000 children were kidnapped. 

These are children who really have no idea who their biological parents are. What their history is.  How did their life start?  Were they the product of a war?  Or were they the product of love with a tragic ending?  

The singer, Anni-Frid Lyngstad, from ABBA, was one of these children.  Her mother - Norwegian - and her father a Nazi sergeant .... born in 1945 out of wedlock and branded a Tyskerbarnas (a German Child) ... 


These children are questioning and hurting .... some struggling, some declaring that they grew up happily and that's all that mattered. But the ones who want answers deserve them.  And there aren't any.  Most of them can't do a family tree because they don't know the name of their birth parents.  

There was an article I read - with a comment that touched me so much.  I'm going to quote it.  Linking the article first. 


Rena Shepherd 

I am 80 years old now, have wondered all my life about who my real parents were. After reading this article, about the Brown Sisters, I recalled all my life that the woman who talked to me had a red cross on a white bunnet. I recall Lebensborn, remembering a lot of little kids laying outside on a little blanket sleeping and beside each child was a little white potty with a handle on it. I walked from child to child picking up the potties and trying to stack them on top of each other. This memory was first, the one with the red cross lady was after. I remember a ride in the train, laying alone in the top bunk looking out the window at the full moon. This is how I got to Germany. I was in 3 different foster homes in Germany and remember my last one well in Solingen. I was only 5 or so then. I have tried once to find out who the Foster parents in Solingen were, through the Solingen newspaper ad, but never heard back. I can very well understand that it takes us a lifetime to get over this and want to find out possibly who my real parents were. I thought all my life that the lady with the red cross hat, was an angel send to take care of me, until I read your article. I have tried Ancestry.com and Heritage, but I dont have names of my parents so every door was shut for me. I was lucky enough to have been adopted when I was 6 or so by a lovely woman, who may or may have not been my real mother, she passed on in 1981. I never asked many questions because it hurt her to speak about this, she only said that I was her real daughter. I never resembled her by looks. But until now have never opened up about my past. Do I really want to know or keep believing the beautiful story regarding my real father she told me? He never got to see me, was killed before I was born. Perhaps?? I dont know why I am writing this, it will most likely go into your trash, but it felt good talking about it. Thank you .

I think that says a lot.  

Here are some other articles: 







I need to read a few of them more in depth, some I skimmed.